By Dennis O'Keefe on Dec 19, 2017
About 20 years ago, I wrote a silly little Christmas poem for our client newsletter. The majority of you have not been clients for 20 years. I thought I would reprint it in light of the Christmas Season upon us.
A Holiday Poem!
'Twas the night before Christmas for this Metro commuter
Nothing was stirring, except for my computer.
I'd been up since eight getting a head start on my taxes
But all I could do was shout curses and vexes
To that awful Service called Internal Revenue.
And the folks down in Washington - each one of them too.
Only one week to go before this year was done
There must be more loopholes through which I could run.
Before the year end and Baby New Year had awoke
To blow the whistle on the clock's last stroke.
I knew that too little could be done in next year
To correct the mistakes that could cost me so dear.
Excel and Turbo Tax ran furiously on the screen
I never had time to look out at the scene
That was going on in my yard, from driveway to mailbox
A brilliantly lit carriage pulled by a cow and an ox.
"A cow and an ox?" I exclaimed as I turned
"Yes," said a voice "Little gas they do burn."
"Who are you," I said. "And why here so late?"
"I heard your tippy typing" he said opening the gate.
In his coat pocket were pens of all size and color
And in a holster on his hip was a shiny calculator.
He was dressed in a suit, which I found quite odd.
"Don't mind my appearance. By the way, the name's Claude."
"I am a financial planner - a wizard," he exclaimed
"Ignore my outfit, I cannot be blamed."
He went on about how even on a night such as this
That his wife insisted he look as if he was on a best dressed list.
It was part of his persona to have suit and tie
"But you must truly believe me, my boxers are tie dyed."
"I'm not here to talk about my appearance or clothes."
And in a flash we were seated at my desk - nose to nose.
He turned to the screen and looked with intent.
Then his mouth opened as wide as my home heating vents.
It curled with a smile as he began to speak.
"You've missed a few things. They just need a tweak."
In a flurry of fingers over keyboard and mouse
He found me a refund through deductions on my house.
Then he reviewed the rest of my finances.
For savings and makings and to increase my chances
Of preserving my wealth at death and in cases
I had to go into one of those nursing home places.
After an hour of lectures, talks, and discussions
I had to know something. And I just kept pushin'.
"Who are you," I said with gladness and thanks.
"I know you don't work for the government or banks."
"But who can do so much with so little?
You spent just thirty minutes to fix and to fiddle
With my taxes, retirement, estate plan and such.
How can one man know all this much?"
He smiled and nodded and listened so knowingly.
Then softly he spoke. "I'm the one and only
Person that looks at your taxes, and wills
And retirement and investments, insurance and bills."
"To find every penny that you can spend this Holiday season.
And to protect your dollars from bandits and treason."
"I am a financial planner - your financial planner now."
(Although he never truly explained the ox and the cow)
"My job is to look out for your interests best.
To take a serious look at your finances - not in jest"
"And to be there when called to protect and preserve
And to untangle your finances like a can full of worms."
"You won't find another professional who looks quite like me
At your finances to see all there is to see."
"Please don't think of me as a deity or god
And if you need me again. . . just ask for Claude."
With a wink and a nod, he started to fade
And his carriage and its team started to wade
Through the new fallen snow that had started to stick
On the front lawns and sidewalks, making them slick.
Did I just dream the last hour or two?
The card taped to my screen made it more true.
"Remember to call on a regular basis
So you and your money can go to new places"
Like a child on Christmas morn, I shot up the stair
And awoke my whole family. "CLAUDE HAS BEEN HERE!"
Donna, Anna and I wish you all a safe and Merry Christmas, a Happy Hanukkah and much prosperity in the New Year. If you have any year-end questions or concerns, please don’t hesitate to contact us at firstname.lastname@example.org or call us at (800) 453-3209.
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This blog is the opinion of Successful Money Strategies, Inc. and is provided for informational purposes only and is not intended to provide any investment advice or service. Statistics and other figures are accurate at the time of original publishing. Any advice herein should not be acted upon without obtaining specific advice from a licensed professional regarding the readers own situation or concerns. Always count your change.